Monday, June 13, 2011

Running versus Cycling

My wife is training for a half marathon and has spent the last few weekends doing long runs to prepare. I decided to keep her company on yesterday's run, which led to the inevitable comparison of running versus cycling. Here it is by the numbers:

Running: shorts, socks, underwear, shirt. Total cost=$200. $250 if you're a woman and need a quality bra.

Cycling: shoes, bibs, socks, jersey, helmet, gloves, glasses. Total cost=$775. A little foam padding in the bibs makes them cost five times as much as a pair of running shorts and underwear even though they're made out of essentially the same materials.

+1 running

Running: shoes. Total cost=$125. $250 if you also want a pair of trail running shoes.

Cycling: bicycle. Total cost=$4000. That much again if you also want a mountain bike. That much again if you also want a TT bike. Half that much again for a cross bike.

+1 running

Running: watch. Total cost=$35-$400 depending on whether you want a Timex or a top-of-the-line Garmin.

Cycling: computer. Total cost=$50-$3000 depending on whether you want a wired Cateye or a top-of-the-line SRM. Multiply by number of bikes you own.

+1 running

Running: you can run pretty much anywhere you can wear shoes. Want to run on a business trip? Pack some shoes and a pair of shorts in your carry-on.

Cycling: you need to find a suitable road/trail and a way to get there. Want to ride on a business trip? Either arrange for an expensive rental that will require an extensive dick dance to get it to almost fit or else purchase a very expensive travel box for your bike and be prepared to pay the equivalent of a second fare when you inevitably fail to convince the airline agent that it's a "trade show display."

+1 running

Likelihood of desperately having to poop at some inopportune moment during any event of 90 minutes duration or greater:

Running: >80%
Cycling: <0.1%

+5,000 cycling

Final tally
Running: 4
Cycling: 5,000

Credit where credit is due to The Oatmeal for his similar comparison of the pros and cons of a man sitting down to pee.


  1. I once took a dump on the volleyball courts at Liberty Park during a run because I couldn't hold it long enough to make it the last 100 feet to the bathroom. At least it was early enough in the morning that I'm pretty sure no one saw me. TMI?

    Of course, the real problem with running is that the equivalent of an mechanical is an injury, and you can't make that go away with money and a wrench. But when I'm not dealing with my gimpy right knee, I'll choose trail running any day.

    Also, I think you're spending way too much on running gear.

  2. Ah, bummer! I meant "many" not "man". Should prolly use your "preview" feature, yes?

  3. Faceless Ghost, DON'T ADMIT IT! Ick.

    Also, sbj clearly didn't buy my running clothing; I didn't know I had such a large budget.

  4. Using "dick-dance" correctly in a post:

    +1 SkiBikeJunkie

  5. 90 minutes or greater? No way. The running-poops take about 10 minutes to manifest. But I did learn that I can run for a long time while "holding it".

    I made my own bike vs run list after my SLC half-marathon. Aaron beat me by about 2 minutes at that race. Which happens to be almost the exact amount of time that I spent pooping at mile 7.

  6. FG, I always assumed those sand volleyball courts were giant kitty litter boxes. Did you kick dirt backwards to bury your "litter" after you finished?

  7. Fundamentally, it's a worked in undies. Likewise, ensure that the liner is make with a dampness wicking material. I have seen a few shorts where it is made of cotton. boxers and shorts