Sunday, January 24, 2010

I spoke too soon

I've had a couple people ask me if there's been any fallout from my decision last Sunday to skip church and go skiing instead. There hasn't. At least not directly.

After reading today's announcements at church, however, I can't help but think the stake leadership got word I didn't think their activities were engaging and planned something just for me. This is word-for-word from the announcement sheet, except for the emphasis, which is mine:
Stake Valentines Dance - "An Evening in Paris" will be held on Saturday February 13th, 2010 from 7:30 - 11:00 pm. [Somewhere in Zion] Stake Center, semi formal attire. For adults 18 years old and older.

Live music and dancing
Hors d'oeuvres and Pasties
Fabulous Company

I wonder if, in addition to the pasties, they'll also have g-strings. I'll come prepared to make change in small bills just in case.

22 comments:

  1. I live in the wrong Stake. With Stripper Mom's and all, yours is much more progressive than mine.

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  2. I was in Paris two months ago and didn't see a single pastie. (Of course they generally come in pairs unless you're paying an extra buck at the carnie, but that's besides the point.) I'm guessing that your stake Paris dance might lack authenticity.

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  3. Oh and I'm a bit jealous that I didn't come up with the "heresy" label. Very clever. Not that I'm promoting heresy or anything...

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  4. At least they got Hors d'oeuvres right.

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  5. Adam, funny you mention that, because as I was transcribing last night, Rachel pointed out that I'd spelled it wrong and had to fix it.

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  6. Do you want to take a Lutheran to church? Cause I am game.

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  7. I really hope they have a maximum age limit on the Pasties.

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  8. I am proud to report that I am the guy that typed that announcment.

    Gotta push the limits every now and again.

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  9. Jonnie J: now you just have to deliver. I like JZ's suggestion of a maximum age, though.

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  10. There is nothing wrong With Pasties that double as slipper. is there?

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  11. I'm interested to hear what this maximum age will be. Go on, tell us what the max age is..

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  12. Seems like there's an IPhone/Touch app about tasty pasties. I don't have any experience with it though, so I can't recommend it.

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  13. Rabid, I can't say specifically what the max age is, but I'd recognize it when I see it. (How's that for mixing political references with ageism and misogynism--what was that you were saying about testosterone central?)

    I'm not sure it even has anything to do with chronological age. But I do know that if someone resembling the perky model from your masthead showed up, the small bills I'd be there making change with would be in higher demand.

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  14. Too funny. I think you may want/need a weight limit as well as well as an age limit.

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  15. Dude. Are you in marketing? You're in marketing, aren't you. The clue is in the flowery discourse that says commits nothing. I suppose you could be a politician too.

    All of this because of one missing letter...

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  16. Ooops... says AND commits nothing.

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